FURTHER THOUGHTS

After having been with Mom and the caregivers for two weeks, here are a few other thoughts:

1) We need to continue to insist that she feed herself. She CAN feed herself if she is positioned upright in the chair, with the tray as high as it can go, and with her elbows free. Put a "clothes protector" (bib) on her. Once this goes, we are again in a very different neighborhood. She has to be prodded. She's hungry because she asks for food, but will give up easily. Next step in my mind is to give her strictly finger food - no foods that require utensils.

2) Her body is giving in much sooner than her mind which is going to make caring for her much more physically demanding. It is already close to being too hard for one person to handle, with bathing and toileting being at the top of the list of difficulties. The alter ego who appears at 5:00pm ("Helene" as Maggie calls her) makes it even more difficult. She is not going quietly into that goodnight.

3) If we require more outside help, we'll be spending more money. Each of us needs to evaluate how we feel about continuing home care. I for one think we need a medical assessment so that when we are at the decision time, we have all the information we need. I do not know what would the the tipping point between Assisted Living Facility and Skilled Nursing Facility. I am a proponent for Assisted Living. The only thing disqualifying her presently are the wounds she has. Once these are cleared, the longer we wait, the more we are sealing her fate, i.e., a Skilled Nursing Facility (nursing home).

That's all.