Woodlawn Memorial Update

OK, we're good to go. Eileen and I talked in more detail about how we'd pay for plot, etc. We'll be making a $650 down payment and paying the rest over 60 months (no finance charge, just flat amount). I sent in the check and the signed contract this afternoon.

Please feel free to contact Jamie Westbrooks, Family Service Counselor, at the cemetery if you would like to go to see the actual spot. He was able to find a nice one right under one of the trees, which is perfect for someone like Mom who has always had a special bond with trees. We can actually swap this spot for another one if we don't wait too long to do so. We can also pay a bit extra and have a tree planted (in the area).

Part of this arrangement is for a bronze marker. For the base price, we can request 6 words of endearment in addition to Mom's name and dates. For example: Loving wife, mother, grandmother and friend. I'll let the "wordsmiths" of the family come up with the best option here. We can use several more words (not sure of actual limit) for add'l charge.

If you have any questions, just let me know. You can also call Jamie at (864) 244-4462. He is very nice and I'm sure would be happy to answer any questions you might have about the entire process.

Eye update

Tom got another eye appt set up for today after seeing Mom's eye deteriorate over the weekend and he had Maggie take her in today for a check up. Dr. Myers referred her to Ballenger - the cornea specialist who treated her when she had the staph infection. Maggie will take her tomorrow and Tom will meet them there.

Let's not panic and get Gaucher involved when he doesn't need to be - there is nothing he can do. Pugh is in the driver seat regulating medications and Gaucher has 100% confidence in him per previous discussions. I called Pugh's office late Friday and am waiting for return phone call to discuss the need (or not) to continue the current extra doses of Metalazone. Mom's legs look much better and her weight is down from 118 to about 113, +/- a pound or two. It's prudent at this point to discuss backing off the Metalazone so that we don't blow out her kidney. Pugh needs to make the call. I'll find out what he says and advise later.

Dan

Mom Update

Eye: Talked to Maggie this morning. She took Mom to eye doctor today. Since Mom's eye is not clearing up, Dr has referred her back to Dr. Ballinger, the specialist who saw Mom earlier this year. He has also taken her off all drops but one until Dr. Ballinger gets a chance to review her case - concerned about "additives" and/or Mom's reaction to meds. Maggie will be taking Mom to Dr. Ballinger tomorrow at 9:30 so we'll have more info then. I'll plan to call Dr. Ballinger after the appt to get direct input.

Cardio: Mom's legs are less swollen, bleeding has stopped and sore is healing, per Maggie. I spoke to Dr. Gaucher's assistant this morning. She gave me the same information re: echo that Maggie had rec'd last week. Mom's heart muscle is weak but stable, essentially the same as the last echo done on 6/07/06 at 20 - 25% (45 - 60% is normal, not 100%).

Also, passed on the info re: swelling, oozing and bleeding legs as well as new dosage for metalactone (not on Mom's chart as of today). Nurse said with all the diuretics (I think 3 of Mom's meds are such) she would expect Mom to be "worn out" and running to the bathroom a lot. She recommended monitoring Mom's fluid intake and not let her "drink sweet tea all day" (a Southern thing). Also monitor her sodium intake (I told her that is not possible). She said just do the best we can. She will pass this info on to Dr. Gaucher and let us know if he wants to see Mom before her Sept pacemaker appt (she didn't expect he would, particularly since her legs look better today).

Cemetery Plot: Lastly, Jamie Westbrooks called this morning and said he found a "very nice spot, right next to a tree", which is hard to find in the area we were looking at. From the comments I have received, I don't think there are any objections to moving forward with the cemetery plot and I'm also assuming we will only consider the one spot for Mom. I am going to go ahead with the arrangements unless there are any objections so please let me know if you have any.

All for now.

Mom's Echo

Maggie just called. A woman called from the doctor's office with the echo report - "Mom's heart is still weak and all other things are the same." I think I will call tomorrow to get more information, unless anyone else would like first-hand info. Just let me know if you do, that's fine.

Mom's Eye

Just an update. I've included the prior email content just to have in one place.

Maggie took Mom to the eye doctor. She said she was happy to do it, "Praise the Lord", "it was not at all a problem", "they're just sitting there any way". That's good news.

Doctor Caldwell(sp?) has changed Mom's meds. Discontinue new drops, continue with prior drops (in frig, I forget the name) 4 times/day, Genteal gel 4times/day, bacterium ointment only at bedtime (no longer in morning) and Optiva drops as needed. Keep eye clean as we can.

Dr's office will be calling Maggie with appt time for next Monday. Maggie says she is happy to take Mom.

Also, Mom's leg looks better today and is not weeping.

Also, I called the house this morning thinking they would have been back from the appt but got the answering machine. Somehow the "welcome message" has been deleted and all you hear is garbled sounds. Could someone re-record the message?




Prior:
"I left the following note on the blog last night but thought I would copy and resend this morning since there were no comments when I checked this morning and I'm not sure if anyone saw it.

I called the doctor's office again last night and talked to Dr. Caldwell who was on-call. He agreed to suspend the new med and asked that Mom come in this morning to see him. We now have a 10:00 appt to see him. Maggie will be taking Mom. She says she has no problem doing it. If Dan or Tom would rather go, just contact Maggie to make that change.

"Maggie called late this afternoon to tell me that Mom's eye is much worse today - much redder. Since it might be caused by the new eye drops I told her to discontinue use of that for tonight (only one more round any way) and that I would call the doctor's office.

Called and left a detailed message and asked for an appt for tomorrow (Thurs). I'll call again in the morning to make sure we get one. Maggie said she would have no problem taking Mom so, unless anyone has an objection, that is what we'll do. Please let me know if you think we should take another approach."

Mom Weekend Update

We had a good weekend with Mom. She seemed a bit weaker and more frail but no noticeable mental deterioration and in pretty good spirits. She has been asking to be "wheeled" from kitchen to bedroom more often.

Morris came for lunch on Saturday and then again for dinner. Also came over over Sunday morning and Monday afternoon. Two eucharistic ministers came Sunday morning - Jackie Smith and Francis Steele - to bring Mom communion, which she seemed to appreciate. They will be coming every two weeks unless Mom decides she would like to change that schedule and see them more or less often. Jackie and Francis also gave me three contacts from the church who can help us with various things, legal, hospice, etc. They all work in the community as well as give presentations at the church from time to time; also participate in outreach. I will call each of them to find out more about what they might do for us, now or in the future.

We took Mom for her echo cardiogram - a very interesting process, unbelievable what you can see on the screen. Results will be reviewed by Gaucher and then communicated to us; no input from the person doing the procedure. Mom's legs continue to be very swollen, more so as the day progresses. The callus on her foot is also painful. Monday morning Mom developed another bleeding/oozing spot on her right leg while we were at the eye doctor. It was pretty heavy at first but then stopped. When we got home Maggie put a bandage on it and things seemed to be OK when we left later in the afternoon (about 5). She was planning to take off the bandage today to let it form a scab but when I talked to her earlier she said that it continued to drain last night while Mom was asleep, so much so that it bled (a clear pinkish fluid) through the bandage and onto the sheets and pad. Maggie has changed the dressing several times today and will be checking it before she leaves to see if she can leave it off tonight. Mom's new meds are helping her lose weight(now 115) but the legs are still swollen. Last Friday I had called Pugh's office to see if they had communicated anything to Gaucher's office about the increase in her metalactone (?) and they had not. According to Terry, they normally don't communicate things like that. I asked her to do it this time since Gaucher will be reviewing her echo and will hopefully know about the med change. The echo person could not verify if that had been communicated. Don't know if it's time to take her to see Pugh again. Once Gaucher reviews the echo and knows about the meds he might want to see her also.

Mom's eye has not gotten worse but it hasn't gotten much better either. Still very red. Dr. Shelly thought that while the vancomycin was helping it might also be an add'l irritant so he gave us a semi-replacement med - vigamox - to interchange with vancomycin. In other words, still use drops every two hours but alternate between the two. Really need to keep the eye clean also. Maggie put a small chart on the frig for other caregivers. If things don't improve, they'll want to do a culture. Also want to see her in a week or two. I did not schedule an appt since I thought it would be better for whoever would be taking her to do that for their convenience. We could consider having Maggie take her and then call the doctor later.

Bob and I also visited the cemetery again on Monday and talked more specifically about the options. There is availability in a number of areas. In order to narrow choices, we should first decide if anyone in the family has an interest in purchasing a plot alongside Mom now. If not, I would suggest we go ahead and get this decision behind us.

Bob and I liked an area within the cemetery called Garden of Eternity. There is ample room for others. If we decide we only want one plot, then any number of places within the cemetery are available (usually extra plots not used by other family plots).

The costs are as follows:

Single Plot: $2,995 (less $500, if we commit by the end of the month)
Flat, ground-level marker: $2,580 (Bronze, granite, state fee, install)
Open/Close Process: $1,095
Other/Taxes: $218
Total: $6,389

We would make a 10% down payment and pay remaining over 60 months (full balance would be due at Mom's passing if not yet paid in full). We can also make our final plot selection following our commitment as long as we don't wait too long. Jamie Westbrooks is our contact (864-244-4622) and I would recommend any local folks contact him to see exactly where the Garden of Eternity is located within the cemetery and do a walk-through of available plots. If you have another preference after that, just let us know. If you'd rather Bob and I finalize that part without everyone doing the walk-through, we'd be happy to do that. I told Jamie we'd like a tranquil, pretty spot, near a tree and away from any traffic, noise or ugly views. Please let me know your thoughts so we can get this part behind us.

I think that's it for now.

NEW SCHEDULE and QUESTION

All - Please take a look at your personal e-mail accounts. I have attached a new Schedule for September, October, November, December. Not all of us are on the Blog and I need answers to some questions.

Thanks.

Eileen

Doctors appts next week

Sorry but something came up at work so I can't take Mom on the 7th to the eye doctor. I'm hiring a new employee and HR set up interviews on Mon, Tue, & wed of next week. I just found out late today.

To add to the complication, I found out today from Maggie that Mom had an echo appointment with Gaucher at 9:30 tomorrow that I think we all we unaware of. I thought I could take care of that but a meeting was called late today for the AM that I have to be at so I canceled the Gaucher appointment tomorrow and rescheduled for Monday morning at 8:30AM. I guess our options are to cancel, reschedule, or have Maggie take her in if no one else can cover.

The appointment needs at the moment are:

Monday 6 Aug - 8:30 AM Dr Gaucher office for echo test

Tuesday 7 Aug - 9:45 AM Dr Shelly for eye check up

I'm unable to handle either one. Can anyone else handle these appointments? If not, I'll cancel and reschedule.

I cancelled the follow up Gaucher appointment on the 8th. He agreed to call us with the results of the echo. I've taken Mom to these follow up visits after the echo test and it's a waste of time, quite frankly. It's standard practice for them to schedule a follow up with Gaucher so we will have to request they call us with the results each time this echo test comes up.

Can anyone cover the appointments?

Dan

Spoke with Pugh's office yesterday concerning swelling and skin scrape on leg. It's minor but with the swelling it's been oozing water and sometimes blood. Maggie had been bandaging it but I took that off over the weekend to get air to it to allow it to scab over. As of last night, it is beginning to do just that. Pugh's office confirmed this to be the best course of action. It needs to scab over to heal.

Mom was not responding to the increased Metalazone treatments until yesterday which is unusual that it took so long. She dropped 4 pounds as of yesterday which is a good sign that it may finally be kicking in. Pugh wants us to continue treatment for another week then consult again to determine need to take her in to see him. She is now (has been for 2 weeks now) getting the Metalazone 4x per week (Sun - Tue - Thu - Sat). As she drops weight, we need to make some judgement calls daily on the need to cancel or shift a treatment a day or more depending on weight loss. Expect extra, sometimes unproductive, trips to the bathroom with the increased Metalazone treatments.


Dan

Eye doctor visits

Dr Myers and Dr Shelly saw Mom Friday and Monday repectively. Dr. Myers went on vacation. No change in the eye since Friday, but Dr Shelly said it was no worse. Mom has conjunctivitis in the right eye but it is not on the cornea. Mom is now on new medication Vancomycin eye drops (since Friday) and now Bacitracin anitbiotic gel as of yesterday. Dr. Shelly said use up the Vanc. since we'll have to get another prescription for it anyway.(We had a mix up in how to use this drug, my fault for not instructing caregivers well enough. Shelly was fully appraised of situation and said go ahead with it.) Current careplan for eye is Vanc. every two hours, Bacit. 2x per day, am/pm (bedtime) (discontinue Genteal gel), Optive drops 4x per day (allow lapse time between Vanc and Optive drops so as not to have one wash out the other.) Follow up visit is Aug 7th (Tues) at 9:45 am with Shelly. I tried to get the appointment for my next weekday off, but neither doctor was available on that day. I went over plan with Pam and wrote down instructions and centralized all the eye meds (except for Vanc which has to be refridgerated) in a plastic bag marked "Eye care." The prescription for the next batch of Vanc is in this bag. It has to be specially mixed. On Friday Dr. Myers had a pharm. on Grove St. mix it.

test post

Just wanted to see if I'm in.

Update 17 july:

Mom's legs have swelled much more than when I saw her last week, so much so that they have begun to weep and bleed again. Her weight and BP are stable though. Her breathing is more labored as well and you can hear some wheezing. Dr Pugh instructed to increase the Metolazone to 4x per week for the next week. If the swelling/weeping does not improve, we'll need to take her in to see him.

She seems to be getting use to Gwen but she really doesn't like her. I think it's just a personality clash. The good news is that she wasn't crying about this time and was very understanding of the need to have someone there. I think the best approach to dealing with this problem is to let her know having someone there is more for us than for her so that we can sleep at night knowing someone is there. She seems to get this.

Woodlawn is the way to go. Tom and I discussed this many months ago but whatever you all decide is fine with me.

MK - please be sure to get paychecks to Maggie, Gwen, and Jackie. They are all concerned about getting paid on time. Just so we are clear on this mattter, this is your task now. I will not be writing checks.

Dan

Update - July 15, 2007

Update July 15, 2007

A few things to update all of you on some things:

Mom’s Weekend: Uneventful. More of the same. Morris visited on Sunday. Good spirits and seems alert and stronger than the last time we saw her.

Mom’s Eye: Her right eye continues to be red but improving with drops.

Mom’s Car: Greenville Auto tax was paid by Jane or Eileen and the new decal is on the car. I’m not sure we have the correct registration certificate in the car. The old one looks different than the new one so I’m going to call the tax collector to make sure we have the right document . The insurance card is in the car. Morris is upgrading the insurance on the car to include liability; I’m a bit confused but I think he only had collision or something like that.

Garbage Can: Moved the garbage cans to the garage. Maggie has difficulty getting down the kitchen stairs and then getting it up to the street – easier from the garage and up the driveway. FYI – Friday is garbage day. Roy says he’d be happy to take care of if Maggie has trouble with it (so far, I don’t think she does so Roy can be a back-up)

Summer Kitchen and Family Room Stuff (+ Morris’s clothes): Didn’t make any progress on this. Next time we’ll take all of it to Goodwill so please take (or set aside) what you want before then.

New Money Market account and on-line banking at SunTrust: Opened new account so we can get some add’l interest. Left signature document in kitchen desk for Dan to sign and take/send to bank. Also set up on-line banking and will start using next week. If you want the sign-on and password, just let me know. Talked to Eileen about possible credit card for use by anyone staying at Ivanhoe. We can also continue to use the debit cards (just need to pass information to me via email so I can reconcile the account.)

House Value: Roy gave us an appraiser contact; Fred Beire who charges about $300 for an appraisal. Let me know if you think we should proceed with this or just use a real estate agent to assess house value. When I was in SunTrust last week they used an internal program that estimated $149,00 to $175,000. That would be very good news .

Legal Documents: I’ve reviewed most of Mom’s legal documents for the lawyer and will be copying in advance of his review. I’ll be sending you a list this coming week so you’ll see what we have. Please let me know if you have any concerns or want more information once you get it.

Funeral and Burial Arrangements: Part of Legal Doc review led to the Mackey Funeral Expense insurance (most of the funeral expenses are covered and you’ll see more this week on this). Talked to a very nice man who sent me more info re: burial plots, etc. which led Bob and I to Woodlawn Cemetery this morning for a drive through while Morris was with Mom (at the other end of Edwards Road, across from Red Lobster). Their office was open so we talked to another nice man who gave us the following info re: burial plot (not included in Mackey). Lot’s of different choices but discounted if we arrange prior to Mom’s death. Two basic choices: in-ground burial or mausoleum.

In-ground
Burial plot: $1,595 to $3,000 + (based on location within cemetery) . Plots are available.

Open/close grave: $1,095

Bronze burial plaque/marker (no headstones): $2,000 to $5,000 + (differences based on size, number of words, decoration, etc.)

Burial Vault (cement enclosure for the casket): Mom already has this with her Mackey service


Mausoleum Option
Crypt: $3,500 to $5,000 + (depending on location, inside or outside access, level/height of placement – six levels; eye level placements are more expensive than ground level or top level

Bronze burial marker: Each one the same – standard: $915

Open/close crypt; $795

Benefits of Woodlawn
Close to Ivanhoe

We can pay over time with no interest charged.

Part of a nation-wide “chain” – Dignity

Have a bereavement travel program which provides lower cost air travel, hotel and car rentals for immediate family traveling to the funeral.

It is one of the oldest cemeteries in Greenville, very open, no headstones, looks like a nice place and is well-maintained. Have no idea how it might compare to other Greenville cemeteries.

Dependent on a number of things, the mausoleum choice can be slightly less expensive. More people are picking mausoleums for some reason these days, according to the cemetery guy – preferring not to be under ground.


The sooner we make this decision, the better off we’ll be since we can get this decision behind us and start paying for it. Last minute decisions will cost more according to cemetery guy. I would suggest Vic, Tom and Dan do a drive-through and give others their impressions of the place. I have no idea of a cost comparison. Proximity to Ivanhoe and the look of the place sort of sold us. Open to any other options if someone wants to offer one.

If choosing, in-ground placement, the man suggests seriously thinking about buying more than one spot since inevitably family members seem to want to be buried next to “kin” down the road. Bob and I wouldn’t be interested but others might. Like buying real estate, can always be sold

Church of the Redeemer Episcopal Church
Rec’d a call from Jackie Smith who is the Eucharistic minister at Redeemer. She was very concerned about Mom since she says she’s called a couple of times (last week and last night) and only heard someone fumbling with the phone but no one answering. Can’t explain last might since we were here when she would have called. She would very much like to bring Mom communion every Sunday if Mom wants it. I forget now who is here next weekend but Jackie is scheduled to come at noon next Sunday. If you would like to change that for some reason or Mom doesn’t want her to come at that point, just give Jackie a call. Her phone numbers are on the refrigerator. Father Bob Horowitz is the new pastor and Jackie says he is a wonderful man, and much nicer than the former priest, the one who married Mom and Morris.

All for now.

Second good night with Gwen

Talked to Maggie this morning. Mom was up a number of times last night but had another good night with Gwen.

Also, sent 2 checks FEDEX for Maggie and Jackie. No problem. Will leave more checks in the desk. Will need to keep track of checks and use of debit cards (if any) so please let me know or leave a note.

Last Night with Gwen

Just talked to Maggie to see how last night went. "Everything went very well for both Mom and Gwen. No problems." All quiet on the western front.

Just a test

Just seeing if I can author something.

FIREWORKS CONTINUE

Well, we got through Kayla and then Peaches (Gwen) showed up. Fireworks turned to bazooka rockets........this is one tough bird, man......had to turn off the baby monitor so that Gwen couldn't hear what she was saying....tough, tough words being spoken.

Anyway, I'm not so good at all of the details. We're going to have to keep our eye on the Gwen thing......not sure she's the right one, but also don't know how to address breaking someone else in. We'll need a local to run ramshod (is that the word?) if we have to go another route. Can some of you other folks have some conversations with Mom about Gwen? Need more data here....maybe that's giving me the answer I don't want to....we need to find someone else. An uncomfortable situation all around.

The week is going good. Mom has had visits from Morris everyday, Tony and Roy Brock twice. Everyone bringing her chocolates.

Had lunch with Morris at Westminster. He seems lonely. The place is very nice and has everything a person could want. I asked him to tell me what he didn't like about it....that there had to be something: his answer was: B-O-R-I-N-G.....

Took Mom to the eye doctor because her eye was red and weepy. Pushed date for next appointment back to July 27 at 2:15pm, a Friday. If no one else can do it, can we ask Maggie to take her? I don't see why not.

All perscriptions are filled.

I think that Mom could be in a place like that if we could get her out of the house.....not with Morris though. In a separate apartment because she would still need her caregivers.

MOM MEETS NEW VISITING ANGEL

A fill-in Visiting Angel arrived a few minutes ago (Kayla - Pam is on vacation) and we are having early fireworks. Mom is NOT happy......more later.

Jane - Got in! Thanks so much....

commonSignON

I have created a common signon for us to use for authoring.

I will send the signon in email

This signon can be used by anyone who does not want to create an individual signon ... no biggie ...

posting to the blog ...

just read Eileen's comment about being unable to post.



I checked out the Help on this, and it seems that the invitation email that went out is critical to getting set up to author.



you must use the link in the email that was sent.



Eileen is giving this a try now, she may have some how-to tips later on.